It blemishes the dream of a glittering world, tarnishes the glamour to fade into the gaudiness of reality. We want the dream, its perfection, its lies, because if it was easily attainable...why would we desire it in the first place?
With that in mind, I think the same applies to fashion bloggers. We wish to view them in a certain way, whether it is to elevate them above the normal strangers we rub shoulders against in the train, or judge them more harshly because we think them less sensitive to criticism. Fashion bloggers, would also like to portray a certain image that suits the words/pictures they put up. Maybe portray is too rigid a word. I think 'keep up a certain image' is more applicable here. But truth is, I know every one, in every profession, does that. Its okay if you don't realize it, you can deny it, just don't expect me not to say it.
Back to my point here.
If this were a fashion blog, I shouldn't talk about the things that matter to me. Not in depth, anyway. Like some super secret government agent, I should choose to slyly drop phrases here and there that hint of what's really going on in my life away from the computer screen and leave the three readers of this blog (I see ya!) salivating over the tiny scraps of reality I dole out.
But the fact its, because I know no one is reading this.......or no one new is reading this, I would like to, for as long as I can, be as honest as I possible. Without pretending to be someone else, without trying to make anyone think of me as a certain character - just me. This is Loren, stripped, naked, raw - and a little chilly. As the thoughts rumble around in my head, my fingers type them out. Easy peasy. Its been a really long time since I have been able to write without feeling self-conscious, and its nice.
Don't worry, when the time comes when I am no longer able to write as freely as I want, I'll tell you. Then you can start hunting for the real Loren between the sentences.
I guess that's my disclaimer of sorts. Or my manifesto.
On other news!
The reason why I have been able to update so much is because Tilly has a life, and I don't. I'm only half-joking there. Okay, one-quarter joking. Right now she is (hopefully) happily snoozing inbetween hotel sheets as a mini getaway trip for herself. I, on the other hand, am stuck in this dry heat in suburbia and receiving shit from family an ocean away. That is some delivery service, I tell you. I would actually update more, but I've reached the maximum of my internet quota and the speed now is so slow I can try to download a page, take a dump, shower, shave my legs, shampoo hair, dry off, wash the toilet bowl, do my facial regiment, get dressed, wash the toilet bowl again, return to the desk and..........the page is still not complete.
Which means......I cannot read my fashion blogs regularly. And I cannot download photos from the couture shows as easily. I want to say IT BLOWS, but Tilly's mind is pretty filthy as it is. So I shall substitute it for IT SUCKS. somehow, it is still no better. How about IT SWALLOWS? No?
I have seen the Christian Dior, Chanel, Armani Prive and Christian Lacriox so far. But not in detail. I guess I'll fawn over them after February 4th (which is when the next internet cycle starts) or when I have settled my lodging. On an ending note, I calmly, without emotional outbursts or drama, hate my brother. Just thought I should tell you that. To be real.
This song always makes me feel a teensy bit better. Doesn't it just make you want to jump around in your underwear and punch your fists through walls? For the record, I don't that.
Chasing Cars (house remix) - Snow Patrol