Wednesday, January 21, 2009

Loren: Picasa in my casa

By now, everyone has seen photos of what the new First Lady wore to the inauguration, (Isabel Toledo ensemble with Jimmy Choo shoes, J Crew gloves) and have moved on to speculate what she will be wearing to the ball tonight(last night?). I wont be posting photos of the inauguration, mostly because upon opening my google reader this morning, I've seen nothing but pictures from the inauguration ceremony and well...thats enough for me today.
Garnering from reports concerned over which american label Michelle Obama chooses to wear tonight, it seems that she still has not made her final choice and is currently preoccupied with helping her daughters get settled into their new residence at 1600 Pennsylvania Ave. Being of a self-centred sort, this makes me think about my current housing dilemma and how troubling it is. What I would give to have someone look after my housing needs for once. It seems that each time I move, it gets increasingly complicated, with the current situation involving a crapbag of a brother, idiocy of a psych major, tight fisted mother and other factors playing the "Let's make Loren's life a mess" game to their heart's content.
I think that people would be generally troubled in my situation, and I'm barely keeping my composure in face of constant obstacles. I am not saying that my moving situation is terrible, but it is on the brink of terrible, especially with february approaching and the possibility of being homeless is drug-addict-high. Still, others don't seem to comprehend the urgency of the matter, or understand that I need to give the estate agents time to do the paperwork...and even then my application may not be successful. I would rub my hands wearily over my face at this point, but I'm trying to prevent a pimple outbreak.
My only consolation is that I have been through a steamroller of bad situations, and somehow I have managed to make it through. Usually scathed, but in one piece nonetheless. So I'll probably get through this one as well. I just have to work the best I can, foresee future problems and outmanoeuvre my foes. 
I am not an optimistic person. I am not anything good or shiny. I don't endure these problems because it will "make me a better person", I try to whack these problems in the face because I know that I have much harder decisions to make in my future...and in the darkness of that, I might as well just solve these 'smaller' problems now. I suppose I'm being cryptic and whiny at the same time, but I'm resigned to having a bitter life with few sweet moments. 
Its strange to be in the middle of the world's scale of "bad scenarios". I know there are devilawful problems out there, and I know that there are people who have a relatively bump free existence. To be in the middle, you feel uncomfortable to make a big deal out of your problems, and at the same time, you look at others and wonder why they can't do the necessary steps to solve simpler problems. 
Whenever a friend is feeling guilty for griping over their problems, I try to help them justify by saying, "Yes, there are worse problems out there....but the difference is, this is happening to you personally. So of course you feel the pinch, and the need to complain about it. Its only human. We can only relate to the things that we have actually experienced first hand." Ohmmmmm.
I don't know what the point of this entry is. 
Probably just to release some of my frustrations. 
Probably because the First Lady put fashion in the backseat to take care of her daughters's transition to a new home. 
Probably because every now and then I miss not having to handle responsibilities. 
Probably because I am fundamentally, human. 

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